My Two Dads

In today's shake-your-head moment, it appears that a Texas mother of 11-month-old twin boys has a little explaining to do. Mia Washington got the shock of her life when she found out her twin boys have different fathers (which, as you might guess, is a very rare occurrence due to the fact that most women don't sleep with more than one man in such close succession, let alone manage to get pregnant with twins while doing so).

Which brings me to my favorite quote ever, in all of Newsdom (or in this case news-dumb): "Out of all the people in America and of all the people in the world, it had to happen to me."

Honey, tripping as you walk to work just happens. Losing your wallet or missing the exit off the freeway or even getting leukemia just happens. But getting pregnant with separately fathered twins is not one of those things that the universe just decides to dole out on a random basis. You see, most people do not put themselves in a situation where this would even be a possibility, let alone a reality, so you can't really take the "Why Me?" approach as if this had an equal chance of happening to everyone. Yes, it's odd that two different men managed to father your twins, but you can't act as though you are surprised to have been struck by lightning when you were out in a thunderstorm with a fishing pole. Intelligent people do not engage in unprotected bed-hopping in such a fashion as to become pregnant by two different men in the same week (no matter how common a feat Maury Povich may make it out to be).

Gosh, Mia, of all the stupid luck! Why couldn't this have happened to some other person who was fooling around on her partner?

Honestly, that is the least of my questions for the universe.