But gone is the era of the rare annoying neighbor who would give you an apple and a spool of dental floss. Now, along with schools that feel compelled to send home fat-kid letters, we have people who have taken it upon themselves to hand out obesity notices to dressed up tots hoping for a Snickers bar.
Yes, pudgy trick-or-treaters who have the misfortune of landing on the doorstep of "Cheryl" in Fargo, North Dakota will receive a little fat shaming to suck down with their tootsie rolls.
"Your child is, in my opinion, moderately obese and should not be consuming sugar and treats to the extent of some children this season," she writes in a handout for overweight trick-or-treaters. "My hope is that you will step up as a parent and ration this Halloween candy and not allow your child to continue these unhealthy eating habits."
Um, lady, you, in my opinion, are outrageously rude and should not be answering the door for trick-or-treaters this season (or ever). My hope is that you will step up as a human being and not allow your big fat mouth to continue these damaging speaking habits.
In other words, "Bite me."
This lady isn't concerned about health. If she were, she wouldn't be passing out candy to little ghosts and goblins whose BMI does not set off her obesity alarm. Memo to Cheryl: If a pillow case full of candy is unhealthy for one child, it's unhealthy for all of them, overweight or not.
But this isn't about health, this is about a woman who likes to think her pant size makes her a superior person. This is about a woman whose own insecurity reaches so far that she thinks she has to shame children on Halloween so that she can feel better about herself.
So, for Cheryl, and all the little skinnies out there who like the taste of superiority that comes from wearing a size 2, or who enjoy looking down their noses at the size 18 pulling through the McDonald's drive-thru and offering Chicken McNuggets to her toddlers, I'm going to let you in on a little secret. Are you ready...?
Okay, here it is. Psssst: Overweight people know they are overweight.
I know. It's shocking. I mean, why on earth would fat people want to leave their houses? They must not own any mirrors or they would know they need to eat less and exercise more. WE NEED TO TELL THEM THEY ARE FAT! WE ARE DOING THEM A SERVICE!
Look, even children are aware of how their size compares to that of other kids their age. They are aware, often painfully, of areas where they don't measure up (or, in this case, measure over). And their parents, who, for the most part, are also aware, don't need a snooty woman to shame their children in front of their friends under the guise of encouraging "healthier" choices.
There's only one person who deserves shaming here, Cheryl, but it's not them.