Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Random Thoughts

Do you suppose environmentalist smokers consider themselves to be littering when they drop their cigarette butts on the street?

How is it that movie stars film nude scenes, take their clothes off for magazines, and wear barely-there lingerie to award ceremonies, and then file invasion of privacy lawsuits over unauthorized nude photos appearing in the tabloids? I mean, if someone wants to see them naked, they can just head to the nearest Blockbuster.

If you want to know what sort of things your spouse would like you to do for him, pay attention to what sort of things he does for you.

There is something wrong with fashion when the goal of maternity clothes is to provide an up close and personal look at a woman's belly button, and the in look among teenagers is loose, flowing tops that conceal non-existent body flaws.

Why are there phone book commercials? Does anyone actually buy a phonebook? Last time I checked, everyone just used whatever book the phone company dropped on their doorstep. (Actually last time I checked, everyone just used the internet to find phone numbers).

Women spend so much time wishing their husbands would do what they want ("If you loved me, you would know what I want...") instead of just telling them what they want.

As my mom pointed out, it seems ridiculous that we have taken childbirth, a completely natural event that would happen just fine on its own 95% of the time, and turned it into a huge, outrageously expensive medical production.

You never realize how some seemingly mild expressions sound until you hear them coming out of your child's mouth.

Do you suppose all the Bush-haters will be bored out of their minds as soon as the President is out of office and they have no one left to blame for their every problem?

People say New Yorkers are rude, but the vast majority I've come across are very nice. Either that or everyone is just a tourist.

Have you ever noticed how people who have affairs always think their married lover will never cheat on them?

Why is it that all humor nowadays has to be vulgar, crude, and foul-mouthed? Have we forgotten how to be funny?

The nice thing about winter is that people remember to put their clothes on before they leave the house.

1 comment:

Tara said...

This is the first thing I'm commenting on because it's right on and so "pithy" ha, ha, sigh. . . That really reminds of hanging out with good ol' David. Thanks to him I know who Bill O'Reilly is. Anyway you probably didn't get our Christmas card since we didn't know you were in NY--awesome by the way. So check out our blog (Christmas is still on there because I'm not a very frequent updater). Merry Christmas late and good luck with the dieting dilemma (I hear ya honey!)