Friday, January 16, 2009

A Bit of Mathematical Dating Advice

Attention all Women: according to a new mathematical formula, when you are out on a date with a guy for the first time, you should not have sex with him.

Whoa! I am, like, totally blown away! You mean it might be a good idea to exchange names, phone numbers (and better yet marital vows) before hopping in the sack with someone?

According to this article, researchers have shown that "lengthy courtships evolved to allow women to weed out unreliable partners" and that "women can increase their chances of mating with a suitable man by delaying sex."

Um, how do I put this?... Oh yes. Duh!

I don't know whether to find it funny or disturbing that we need the latest research, mathematical formula, or scientific study to tell us this totally obvious information. But then, as I'm out and about in the world, I realize that a whole lot of people are truly dumber than a bag of hammers when it comes to the whole sex thing. It seems the common sense connections that used to reside in adult brains have gone the way of the dodo.

I walked by a clothing store the other day with underwear you could personalize to read "Hi, my name is (fill in the blank with your name)". Heck, why stop there? Why not add your phone number and a comprehensive list of STDs you might be sharing with your partner?

Honestly, people get stupider and stupider.

Thank goodness we now have the math to save us from ourselves.

1 comment:

fiona said...

I am totally going to use the phrase "dumber than a bag of hammers" now. I love it! That just hits the nail on the head...haha...okay that was (see phrase above).

But seriously, DUH.