Tuesday, July 14, 2009

It's Official: Women Have Lost Their Marbles

It seems like a no-brainer: having a husband/father to help take care of family makes life a whole lot simpler. Two hands are better than one, divide the sorrows, multiply the joys and all that jazz. But apparently, I am in the minority when thinking that husbands equal good things.

Which just goes to show that it's official: Women have lost their marbles.

A recent survey by Babytalk Magazine found that most women (whether married or single) think taking care of a family would be easier sans husband. To which I respond, scientifically, "What the crap?!"

76% of these women think it would be easier not to have to fight with a partner over raising a child. 69% think it would be nice not to have the "chore" of keeping up a healthy marriage. And a full two-thirds of the respondents think it would be harder to parent with a man in the house.

I'm sorry, but are these women on crack? They think single-parenthood would be easier than a joint venture? So instead of having two people to provide for and take care of a family, it would be easier to do everything themselves?

Since when did a little compromise and understanding toward a spouse become so difficult that the stress and responsibility of single-parenthood became preferable? And why is marriage suddenly considered such detestable "work" that no one realizes how much fun it can be?

The irony of this survey is that the responses are rooted in selfishness. Women think it would be easier not to have to take another person's needs/opinions/concerns into account. But, if they shared family responsibilities with someone else they would actually have more time to take care of their selfish desires than they would if they were doing everything on their own. I mean, here I am, blogging at 9 a.m. because David is busy slaving away at work to provide for us. I could never do that if I were off breadwinning myself, and then coming home to a messy house, whiny child, and a mile-long chore list afterwards.

Obviously divorce, stepchildren, ex-spouses, and unreasonable in-laws make navigating marital difficulties more daunting, and perhaps that's why many of these women find themselves in such a snit over the imperfect behavior and neediness of their husbands all the time.

But I'm just not sure why these ladies feel such a need to play the role of martyr that they'll shoot themselves in the foot repeatedly as they hop away from the people who could help them the most: their husbands.

This blindness to personal stupidity is so ubelievable it would be ridiculous, if it weren't such a tragedy. As it is, it is truly cause to mourn.


Catherine said...

Tax widows have a pretty good pulse on the single Mom thing - don't you think? It's not glamorous. It's dang hard work. These women are definitely smokin' something!! Actually - it's likely they haven't seen a David in action - good Dad pulling his weight; synergy in marriage. The last month or so, with our new twins coming home, I would not have survived without Doug. My first thought, even when our oldest was born was - this is NOT something you want to do alone. Raise a child. The environment where children thrive most is with a loving mother AND father. Society at large has lost its reverence and esteem for marriage. Ugh. Bonnie - where do you find this fodder? It churns my stomach!

Sara said...

"What the crap?!"

Isn't that the truth? I can't believe that some women are so controlling and self-centered that they would WILLINGLY take on single parenthood.

Ask Himself how many times I've moaned, "I was not cut out to be a single parent!" after he returns home from a business trip or (like last week) when I brave church by myself with a toddler who loves nursery so much she can't figure out why she has to sit through anything else.

Now, granted, Himself is a fabulous father, but still...

fiona said...

Crazy. Just crazy. Not only is it selfish, but it makes absolutely NO sense! From the little snatches of "single parenting" that I experience here and there, I cannot imagine WANTING to NOT have a partner in parenting. Insane.