Monday, July 27, 2009

It's Contest Time Again!

Award-winning author Stephanie Black has a new book coming out in August, which means it's time for another "Life as an Adverb" drawing!

From the back cover:

It’s been three years since the terrible night Emily Ramsey suffered a double tragedy—the death of her sister and the disappearance of her fiancĂ©. She deserves another chance at happiness, and gentle, adorable Zach Sullivan is the perfect man to mend her shattered heart. But from the moment Emily opens the hand-carved box holding a glittering diamond solitaire, she’s seized by an unshakeable fear: she’s going to lose Zach.

That’s exactly what Monica, Zach’s ex-girlfriend, is banking on. Bitter with envy, Monica will stop at nothing to sabotage Zach and Emily’s romance. Troubling notes show up in Emily’s mailbox, fanning the flames of suspicion. A bloody photograph sends her reeling. But when someone is brutally murdered, will Emily be able to escape suspicion and the possibility that she might be next?

Whitney Award–winning author Stephanie Black treats readers to another of her brilliantly thrilling stories that will leave the reader no choice but to keep reading well past the stroke of midnight.

If you would like to win a copy of this book, personalized and autographed by the author, leave a comment on this post in which you tell me your favorite joke. If it's funny, I'll enter your name in the drawing. If not, well, you should have thought of that before you submitted the "two lemons were in the shower" joke (ahem, Evil HR Lady).

You have until August 7th to enter for a chance to win!

Oh, and the midnight thing is totally true, so don't start reading this book unless you intend to stay up late!


mathmom said...

What do you get when two silk worms race?

A tie!

Anonymous said...

10 Games Seniors Play:

1.)Sag, You're it
2.)Pin the Toupee on the bald guy
3.)20 questions shouted into your good ear
4.)Kick the bucket
5.)Red Rover, Red Rover, the nurse says Bend Over
6.)Doc Goose
7.)Simon says something incoherent
8.)Hide and go pee
9.)Spin the Bottle of Mylanta
10.)Musical recliners

Rizley Family said...

This Little Piggy

* This little piggy went to market.
* This little piggy stayed at home.
* This little piggy had roast beef.
* This little piggy had none.
* And this little piggy went “cough, sneeze” and the whole world’s media went mad over the imminent destruction of the human race, and every journalist found out that they didn’t have to do too much work if they just did a “Find ‘bird’, replace with ’swine’” on all their saved articles from a year ago, er, all the way home.

mean aunt said...

Ask me if I'm a tree.

kws said...

Why couldn't Batman go fishing?
Robin ate all the worms!

(You changed the rules so the jokes don't have to be funny, right?)

Tiffany said...

Sorry Bonnie. You're right. I'm just not that funny! =)

Stan said...

There are three types of people in the world, those who can count and those who can't.

mean aunt said...

Stan, there are 10 types of people--those who understand binary and those who don't

Cameron and Nonie Gay said...

Bonnie, I'm fried and really can't think of a joke, unless you want to talk about my exercise routine, but can I be entered anyway?

Amy said...

My brother loves this typical of him:

Back in the days of cowboys and Indians, toilet paper had just been invented. An Indian, unaware of the new invention, was amazed when he saw a cowboy using it out in the woods. Instead of scalping the cowboy, he offers to let him live if he tells the Indian where he can get some toilet paper. And the cowboy told the Indian about a trading post in the middle of the forest.
The next day, the Indian was looking over the different types of toilet paper and asked the clerk how much the “Soft and Gentle” was.“That'd be $2.50,” said the clerk. “Too much,” mumbled the Indian, “how about the 'Gentle'?” “That one's $2,” answered the clerk. “Still too much,” complained the Indian, “anything cheaper?” “Welllll,” replied the clerk, “We do have a generic kind.” “What generic mean?” asked the Indian. “It means it doesn't have a name, and it's only 50 cents.” “Me take that,” said the Indian.
The next day, the Indian returns to the trading post and tells the clerk, “Me have name for generic toilet paper.” “Oh,” says the clerk, “what's the name?” “Me call it John Wayne... it's rough, tough and it take no crap from Indian.”

The Davis Clan said...

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

fiona said...

What did the general do with his army?

Put it in his sleeve-y!

(Hee, for some reason, that's the joke I always remember and like. Wow. I need to find some more jokes. Good thing there's a great selection above! ;)

foculbrown said...

Sorry, Bonnie. We've been on vacation. I have 3 year's worth of bad Cub Scout jokes that I could post. I'll just post a couple.

What do you get when you cross fairy tales and arithmetic? Myth-ematics!

What's the difference between a shiny dime and a dirty quarter? 15 cents.

How do you fix broken spaghetti noodles? With a little tomato paste!!

Deonne said...

From Josh...
What is faster? Hot or Cold?

Hot. Everyone can catch a cold.

P.S. My vote is for Mandy's joke. That one's a real lol.

overlyactive said...

A turtle is crossing the road when he's mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, "I don't know. It all happened so fast."

lori said...

What did the parents say to the baby tomato? Catch up!