Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Random Thoughts

I haven't blogged in a week, which is, like, a record. I'm sure you've been grateful for the reprieve. I don't really feel like putting anything coherent together, so here are my random thoughts for the day:

Why do women wear long, fake fingernails? Especially women who have to type or use ten-key at their job all day long, like tellers at the bank. I have to double-check my account numbers to make sure there haven't been any press-on-nail mishaps with my deposits.

I hate all the cutesy terms people apply to pregnancy like "preggo" and "preggers". It's like "Hi, I'm preggo, and like, so totally thirteen. And, like, totally responsible and sooo mature, too."

Is it really necessary to have Daylight Savings Time? I blame it for the unreasonable amount of grouchiness I've experienced this past week.

Michael said his first unassisted prayers this week. The first went: "Hennly Father, thank you mommy, thank you daddy, and mommy and daddy. Thank you mommy." The second: "Hennly Father, thank you eight, nine, ten, Amen!" The funny part is I'm sure he is honestly grateful for those numbers.

I've decided I should become irresponsible, stop paying my mortgage and my taxes, (and mostly any other bills I should be paying) and just let Pres. Obama take care of me. At the very least I'm sure I could secure a position in his cabinet.

Teaching primary is spending half the time having good feelings about your class, and the other half wishing you had bought the Costco-sized Tylenol.

I was sitting across the aisle on the subway from a woman who had had such a love affair with collagen injections that she looked like a fish whose lips had been smashed with a frying pan. Is this what beauty has come to nowadays?

I love how media outlets fall all over themselves to treat the Muslim religion with respect, but Mormons are always made to look like intolerant nutcases (with totally freaky ceremonies, to boot).

When information about a medical procedure is accompanied by the words "slight discomfort" this means you should arrive dosed up on morphine and expect to spend the hours following getting acquainted with your bathroom floor.

I find it very amusing that at least once a day someone's Facebook status is: "I have so much to do and not enough time", or "I'm so busy I don't know how I'm going to get everything done". Then what in the world are you doing messing around on Facebook?

Why is it that no one teaches their children playground manners anymore? And why is it that I, as an adult, can tell an eight year-old kid who should know better to get off the slide and let the other kids come down, and he can look at me and say, "No!" without batting an eye? Why do parents let their children get away with such behavior?

I haven't stepped foot in a car for four months. And I haven't seen a gas station in all that time, either. I wonder if I'll remember how to drive?

Looking in on your sleeping toddler at night can give you enough warm fuzzies to last you through nearly the entire next day. Sometimes I look in on Michael two or three times, just to stock up.


Ben said...

Ahh, Bonnie, oh that all people in the world were as sane as you. Thanks for your no nonsense analysis. You know, I have also oft wondered how women with ridiculously long fingernails negotiate a ten-key. The mysteries of life . . . I think I'll take your advice and check my bank statements more often.

MyDonkey Five said...

I hate the term "preggo". It makes me think of Prego sauce. Yum!

And what is up with people not teaching their children manners?

overlyactive said...

So what have you done with your cars by the way. I was thinking about that. Do they have garages or places to put your cars in NY?

Rizley Family said...

Yes, I have contemplated becoming irresponsible. All the irresponsible people around me who are in danger of foreclosing are getting better loans and reduced principal balances, but me, who pays my bills, am not allowed to refinance to a better interest rate. Remind me again what incentive I have to not just totally bail? Oh yes, it's my conscience.

Bonnie said...

We sold my car and some good friends are taking care of our other car. You can park cars in the city, but parking is about $400/month and insurance $500-600/month, so it's not really worth it. I haven't even missed having a car.