Friday, July 2, 2010

Random Thoughts

Yes, it is after midnight, but I'm blogging because I just got back from seeing "Eclipse" and had to write about how good it was!!!!! I heart Edward! Sparkles + Bella 4 Ever!

Okay, not really. (That was just a test to see how well you know me. If you believed it, you should try reading my blog more often.)

However, David and I actually did watch "New Moon" tonight. Well, he watched it. I started it solely because I wanted to blog about it, but gave up after an hour of painful dialogue (and even more painful acting) and fell asleep.

After my nice little snooze I am wide awake, so I guess that means it's time for some late-night random thoughts:

Why is it that there are no children's clothing stores with aisles big enough for a stroller to pass through?

Baby shoes are a giant nuisance. They are cute, but trying to put them on is like stuffing wiggly sausages into barbie shoes.

I have used a magic eraser to get lipstick out of carpet and burnt-on grease off the stove top. I'm convinced these little beauties will save the world.

Why do they make newborn baby clothes with collars? Newborns don't have necks and collars just get up in their faces and drive them crazy.

I think SAG Harbor is pretty much the worst name ever for a clothing line. What woman wants to buy an outfit that makes her think of waist-length boobs?

In the words of my sister: "All Cyndi Lauper songs are better sung by someone else."

If you have a dozen pacifiers sitting on the counter they will all disappear by the time you need one.

They should make bags of Starbursts that contain only strawberry-flavored ones.

Bananas do not belong in fruit salads, period. They just get slimy and mushy and overpower the flavors of other fruits.

David and I went the entire month of June without eating a single bite of ice cream. Elsewhere in the news, hell has frozen over.

There is a direct correlation between how late a parent stays up and how early the kids wake up, so it's off to bed for me.



Megan B ♥ said...

I heard a brief snippet of Cyndi Lauper singing Unchained Melody. Not pretty. Not pretty at all.

foculbrown said...

Where are Bonnie and David? They must be where ever the ice cream went.


fiona said...

I was totally laughing at your opening! Do people really call him Sparkles, or is that your brilliant invention?? I love it.

I hate collars on baby clothes, especially when you have a very drooly baby. And the ice cream... I mean.. well... wha- ... WOW! If THAT could happen, maybe the whole Eclipse thing wasn't fake after all...

mathmom said...

I am 100% with you on Bella and Edward etc, baby collars, and Strawberry Starburts. In fact, I didn't even think people ate the orange or yellow ones until I married Stan. He likes that sort of thing.

And, way to go on avoiding ice cream! I'm impressed. I have no self control when I am nursing. I just eat and eat and eat.

Cath said...

This post is hilarious. My two cents: Magic Erasers - what's in them??? Seriously! They ARE magic!! Collars - all newborn outfits with collars are trouble. I have simply folded the collars inside or cut them off. Just in the way! Pacifier story - Over the course of a week I kept losing pacifiers. The boys would have them when I put them down for naps but I couldn't find them after the nap. One by one the supply dwindled until I was down to two pacifiers. I looked under the cribs - nothing. Corners of the room, closet. Where could they have gone??? And during a two hour nap with the door shut and babies confined to their cribs? When I finally pulled the cribs away from the wall to vacuum, there they were - ten or so perched precariously on the lower rim of the crib unseen. Just below the mattress. Mystery solved. But boy they are slippery things! Love your take on life Bonnie.

Sara said...

Do tell me how you used a magic eraser to get lipstick out of carpet, since I'm the proud owner of 1/2 tube of lipstick in my living room carpet, and I'm totally lost as to what to do with it.

And no ice cream for a month?! Wow. That's impressive. :)

Liz Warner said...

You are hilarious! When I was reading the first paragraph of this post I was thinking, "What?? Really??? Are you kidding me?" Oh good you are! LOL. I love that you and David tried to watch New Moon... Jon and I did the same thing - we wanted to see Twighlight and New Moon for the cultural relevance, and just could not do it! So, we actually bought a RiffTrax for both of them, which was HILARIOUS. Both movies are begging to be made fun of. I highly recommend that method - it kills two birds with one stone. You are entertained, AND you see the horrible movie and know what everyone is talking about!