What's in a Name?

"That which we call a rose, by any other name would smell as sweet."

Really, would it now?  Because I don't think William Shakespeare would have penned these words if he lived after Utah came along.

2014 Romeo:  "I know you're a Capulet and I'm a Montague, but names don't really mean anything... Wait, what was your name again?"

Utah girl:  "Braxleigh."

Romeo:  "Uh... never mind.  Just forget I said anything."

(Braxleigh is a real Utah name, you guys.  I'm not making this up).

Unfortunately, most of the ridiculous names I've seen lately are for girls, so not useable.  (*Sniff*  Byrklee.  *Sniff*)  But thankfully, luck appeared just yesterday in the form of a small boy knocking on my door.

"Who are you?" I asked, just before his grandmother appeared from around the corner and said, "His name is Draygen."  (sp?)

"Have you been drinking?" I asked.

"No, his name is really Draygen."

Okay, I made that up.  I didn't actually ask if she'd been drinking.

But since I'm such a generous person, I bequeathed the usage rights for the name Draygen (and any of its possible variations -- Dragon, Dragen, Dr'Agen, Draegon, or Draygon) to a friend of mine who is also expecting a baby boy.

This left me with quite a problem, since the perfect boy name is now in the hands of someone else.  Luckily, my sister, who has taken to texting me name suggestions on a daily basis, came through for me today:

"I have a boy bible name for you," she said.  "Izaak."

"Twin brother to Muzak?" I asked.

"Yes, and sister Prozak."

Prozak!  It's brilliant!

Prozak Zyrtek Overly.

What do you think?

Names and Other Issues

I disappeared.  Again.  

Sorry about that.  It's just that I was busy spending all my spare time with my face in my pillow.  

I'm not kidding.  I wasn't just tired, I was I HAVE TO TAKE A NAP RIGHT NOW OR I'LL DIE tired.  (You should have seen me at Legoland this summer trying to nap while standing in line).  That, coupled with 24/7 nausea might have made me a little bit anti-social and grumpy (sorry, neighbors!)  Don't worry, it wasn't you.  It was me.

Okay, it actually wasn't me.  It was baby number 4, due to arrive in early February!!!

We are thrilled, obviously, though I still find myself not quite believing this is for real.  (11 years of infertility will do that to you).  After I took several pregnancy tests I left them in my nightstand drawer and then went back every five minutes to check on them.  For three days.  (Yep, still says "positive"...  Wait, really??  Let me check the instructions again...)

I was convinced that this little one was a girl, if nothing else because Michael never caused this much trouble in utero (even my twin pregnancy didn't wipe the floor with me the way this one has).  We had a name picked out and everything.  But to our great shock, ultrasound says 100% boy!

So now I need name help.  Because I have about 15 girl names I like and ZERO boy names.  Zero.  But, if you are going to help me with names, first, you have to know my rules for naming:

1.  You are naming a person, not a pet.  I just saw some friend of a friend of a friend on Facebook who named their new baby (a human, presumably) "Lynx".  These are the kind of people who make me fear for the state of humanity.

2.  This baby will need to get a job someday.  A respectable job.

3.  You should know how to pronounce his name as soon as you see it.

4.  You should know how to SPELL his name as soon as you hear it.  Nobody wants to spend a solid third of their life explaining how their parents were drunk and playing Scrabble when they decided to spell Michael M-Y-K-I-L-E.

5.  All my other children have biblical names.  Normal biblical names.  I'm not saying it has to be biblical, but it does have to be normal.  No Methuselah or Nebuchadnezzar or Maher-Shalal-Hash-Baz.

6.  Like I said, it doesn't have to be biblical, but it does need to dwell solidly in the realm of classic or traditional names.  (You really can't have a Michael, Matthew, Leah, and then a Denim Diesel).  

7.  It should be clear what gender the baby is based on name alone.  I know it's the in-thing for parents to be all, this is my baby girl "James", but that's NOT NICE.  Not nice at all.

8.  Naming after a person is fine.  Naming after a thing or a brand is not.  (This is my son "Eiffel Tower Lego" just doesn't cut it).

That's easy enough, isn't it?

Thanks in advance!